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Doc’s Books Announces Historic 1,000,000 pound Challenge
‘Read every last word… if you dare.”
St Patrick, Mo. — Independent publisher Doc’s Books today issued a bold 1,000,000 pound challenge to the reading public: be the first person on Earth to successfully read all 87 of its currently published titles, pass a battery of rigorous comprehension tests, and defend the feat before a live panel of experts.
The prize, one million pounds*, will be awarded only after the winner has:
– Completed every page of the 87-volume catalog without skipping, skimming, or claiming “I got the gist.”
– Passed a multi-day battery of written, oral, and (allegedly) spiritual-discernment examinations designed to confirm actual comprehension rather than mere page-turning.
– Appeared before a panel of independent experts — including literary critics, theologians, military intelligence officers, and a very stern Lutheran pastor — who will grill the contestant on plot points, and thematic nuance
In addition, the winner must contractually agree to participate in all post-victory press conferences and to attend major genre ceremonies, including the Hugo and Nebula Awards, where they will be expected to field questions such as “How did you survive the middle stretch of Book 41?”
“This is not a participation trophy,” said MG ‘Doc’ Woodworth, founder and chief author. “We’ve seen people claim they ‘read’ dense material before. We’re raising the bar. Finish the entire catalog, prove it under oath, and the money is yours.”
A company spokesperson added that the challenge is open to anyone over the age of 18 who can still hold a physical book without their thumbs automatically scrolling.
*Prize funds will be paid in Lebanese Pounds (LBP).
